I have been learning some new words lately. Yesterday
morning after the morning talk from Luang por a woman behind me explained to me
about some of the words that he had used often in his talk. “Yorm”, which sounds more like “Yom” when I
hear it spoken has the meaning of “Surrender without reason, release, or yield”.
It doesn’t mean to surrender to someone in particular or to something in
particular for that matter. It more has the meaning of surrendering to life as
it is at this moment. The without reason part is kind of like suggesting to be
happy without reason – it is just the act of surrendering to the moment without
thinking or analyzing or needing to have a reason to do so.
“Klye” is a word that is used a lot. It means to relax. Not
just the body, but the mind. In our world at present, it is often very
difficult to relax either the body or the mind, but especially the mind. I was
invited to lunch today and had quite an interesting discussion. We were
discussing the idea of asking for forgiveness and I said that this can have
negative connotations in the west because it can be tied up with guilt, or putting
someone in a place of power over you, etc. Forgiveness has all kinds of
different understandings as to what it means and what it’s about, so it can
sometimes be a loaded word. Ning said that she understands it just as a way of
letting go of things that block her mind or body from being able to relax or to
flow. When she says things or does things that bother her in some way, she
finds it helpful to go to the person she said or did them to and ask for their
forgiveness. Yesterday, for example, she told me I was too nice and too polite,
or something along those lines. Today she asked me to “forgive” her for saying
that, since it was a judgment. However I am is OK and “good enough”. Anyway,
the word “Klye” goes deeper than one might expect. The mind becomes more open
as it becomes more relaxed and still, and this openness allows experience to
expand as well. It’s a kind of central idea in the lifestyle here. It doesn’t
mean not to do anything, but it does mean not to strive or try or push to do
things. Relax into whatever you are doing or being…
On the subject of forgiveness, Ning said when she first came
she would ask her own body and mind for forgiveness quite often. From the
perspective here, bodies and minds are things we use for a while. They are
impermanent and changing. We have them for a while, and it is a privilege to
have them. And then they go, and we change to another form. Even without that
belief, it is a fact that bodies and minds are constantly changing and not
permanent. She said that is good to ask your body and mind for forgiveness for
pushing them so hard, being unkind to them in all sorts of ways, and all the
things that we do to hurt ourselves.
Two more words, written in my makeshift phonetics are
coe-mun-ing and deow gorn. Coe-mun-ing has the meaning of by itself, in itself
and let it be. It is used a lot in the discussion of thoughts, feelings, and
things that happen to and around us. All of these things are considered to be
phenomena that are happening in themselves, not necessarily within our control.
Watch thoughts and feelings like a movie. The movie is happening on its own,
without the necessity for you to be watching it. Enjoy it, and let it go. It’s
not personal.
People here seem to be quite good at not taking things
personally. As Ning said, if you come by and I don’t want to come out, I won’t
answer, and if I don’t want to talk, I won’t talk. So if you see me and I’m
talking, it’s because I want to be there. Kind of a nice permission. Just be as
you are, don’t worry about judging or being judged, or what someone else may or
may not think or want.
Deow gorn means “wait a minute” or “later”, and is used in
the context of “I will change/let go/relax…” later. They talk a lot here about
not hesitating. When an action comes to you, just do it without thinking about
it too much. I’m not very good at that at all. There are times when a little
thought is prudent though, it seems to me.
J
It’s been a hot Sunday and now I am sitting in my room with
a battery operated fan that Ning gave me blowing over me. The sky is beginning
to darken and the air is starting to cool a little bit. Thank goodness the days
are short – the sun doesn’t have time to heat everything up quite as much. I
had a rest this afternoon and went out when I heard Jack (one of the teenage
boys that stays in the house here) doing his afternoon floor mopping. I took
over for him for a while, and was offered a drink of sweet juice in a plastic
bag and a kind of banana coconut pudding by some people who came by to see
Ajahn Nu. People are constantly giving me things here. Ning says it’s good
practice. We each give what we are able and we don’t need to give back to those
who give to us. We give to others or in other ways and it all works out in the
balance.
I will leave you with this thought, that came from breakfast
time today: “The ultimate truth of the universe is constantly revealing itself
as the universe unfolds and changes. This is it, the truth of impermanence. What
can one practice? Practice by asking for forgiveness (to yourself, the
universe, God, another person – whomever or whatever works for you) for the
things that bother you, that you hold on to, that block you. Also, give your
compassion and good energy to everyone and to everything as much as you can.”
Klye, yorm… with
compassion…
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